Hello all,
I'm kind of trying to stay active here, so I'm writing stuff each day or so. Today I was just playing around with an odd idea for a caption, but when I started writing it went on for much too long. I'll probably approach it again later, make a better ending, that sort of thing.
Anyway, I'm going to post the new story below. If you want to read it, just click Read More. The story is called Jailbroken, and takes place in the near future. There are no pictures, but I might add some later.
Mmmmm, nice.
ReplyDelete"Find a new line of work" is almost always a good line to find in a story....
Do you like the ending as it is, or does it seem a little sudden?
DeleteFor me, on the one hand, it's just a short story, on the other hand, I tend to like my stories to end with a final bang. So I don't know, do I need to rework the ending or leave it as is? I'm a terrible judge of these sort of things.
I liked the story. You could have ended the way you did or maybe flashed forward a month or so into her life telling about her new job as the headliner at the local strip club doing a hot for teacher show 4 times a night.
ReplyDeleteI Like this story. I'd love to see pictures with it, and see it go forther. Like using the implant not only to chNge her view of the world, but to use it to changer her as well!
ReplyDelete